this is one dream that will come true

Andrew made this at school. I told him this is going to come true very soon. Here is what he wrote in case you have trouble reading his first-grader handwriting:

"My dream is when my mom gets all her casts off then I can play with her. That is my dream." 

the excitement, it is mounting

So big things are finally happening around here. For the past 5 1/2 weeks I have been sitting around with my leg propped up on pillows and watching the world pass me by. HOWEVER, things are beginning to change.

Excitement #1 -- I purchased my Darth Vadar Boot on Monday. (The Darth Vadar boot is also known as a walking cast). This device will enable me to finally begin to put some weight on my right leg after I have my quick and (hopefully) painless outpatient surgery next week. I have an appointment with my surgeon tomorrow, and he will be taking off my hard cast and replacing it with this boot. He will also be taking some x-rays tomorrow to check on the healing. Hopefully things are coming together nicely. I plan on weaning myself off these crutches next week. I really want to chuck them aside and start walking, but I am realistic, and I can see with my naked eye the amount of muscle mass I have lost by not using my right leg over the last 6 weeks. I am realistic that I won't be running right away.

Excitement #2 -- We are heading to the waterpark this weekend! Brooke turns 5 on February 3rd. Her two best friends have birthdays that are within 2 weeks of hers. A few months ago I consulted with the other moms of her friends and we all decided it would be fun to take the girls to the waterpark for their birthdays. Lets face it. When your birthday is in the dead of winter, it is challenging coming up with new and fun things to do. This will definitely be fun. And even though I can't play in the water this time, I plan on having fun anyway. The moms have all decided to get SPA TREATMENTS! I am scheduled for an aromatherapy massage at 10am Saturday. Please remember to avoid the leg! Actually avoid them both, as they haven't been shaved in the last 6 weeks.

Excitement #3 -- I am actually beginning to get out of the house! It is really great. I have been venturing out here and there over the past couple weeks. Last week I went with the family to the kids tennis lessons and lunch. Today a friend picked me up and we also went and had lunch. Good times.

conversation at lunch

I swear that this just happened.



Brooke: "Mom, is this a dream?"

Terri: "You mean right now, is this a dream right now?"

Brooke: "Yeah, are we in a dream right now."

Terri: "No Brooke, this is happening right now. We are not in a dream."

Andrew: "If this were a dream, it would be raining candy by now."

secret confession

Maybe its because I have been stuck in my house for the past month, or maybe I am just plain bored. I have done my share of sudoku. I have read over 5 books, but now I have become a slave to a television show. Worse yet -- it is a REALITY television show!

I know! UUUGGGG! Egads, what could be worse? But internets, have you been watching Project Runway! I am helpless against its powers. I sit with eyes glazed over at the fabulous designers and their dramas! It is like a glorious sled crash that I cannot tear my eyes away from! My husband he just sighs and leaves the room. I am not the woman he married.

My favorite designer? So glad that you asked. NICK! He is fabulous I tell you. He is whom I predict to win it all. He is funny, fabulous, and so obviously talented. He is also over the age of 35 so I am rooting for him on that sheer fact alone. You can keep your Santinos with all their wickity-whack tie ons and over the top ruffles. I can't take the eye rolling and sour faces he makes. He will last the remainder of the show just for the drama he creates. But he is no Nick I tell you. He can't even carry Nick's sewing kit. Although in all fairness, I am sure he is a much nicer person than he is being portrayed on the show. Those evil editing bastards. Here is a funny outtake video that I like of Santino.

So there you have it. One of my only deep dark secrets I will reveal on the internet. I admit I am a hypocrite.

Edited to add: Ok that video link is not working. If you want to go to it, click on episode 7 bonus videos. It is #4 labeled Catchy Tune.

boob squishing on one leg

So as if recovering from my broken leg werent enough, today I went in to have a mammogram. I had scheduled this procedure long before my accident a month ago, and had made arrangements for a friend to drive me, so I wasn't about to reschedule it. I just wanted to get it overwith already.

If you have never had a mammogram before, let me set the scene: The procedure itself is pretty uncomfortable. You stand there naked from the waist up and are (wo)man handled into a huge machine which compresses your breast into a pancake between two plastic plates. Fun! Now try doing it while standing on one leg! Acrobats! Do I get extra credit? No? Nothing? Just more manhandling and squishing. Hurrah. I am happy to report that all my slides were good and easy to read. I didn't have to have any retakes. Phew!

Tomorrow I get to go back to my dr/surgeon. He will take off my cast (again) and check to see how things are healing. I may have more x-rays taken. (Jeez, soon I will be glowing in the dark!) These visits are pretty routine, he asks me how I am feeling, comments on what a bad break I had ("It was horrible"--a direct quote from him, I kid you not) and asks if I need anymore pain medicine. (No thank you.) Then its back home to my couch.

taking stock

So what does this all mean for my doula work? Well, obviously I won't be able to take any clients for a while. Thankfully I did not have a client lined up for January, and Doulicia has agreed to take on my February client. The only other person that I had confirmed, was a mom who was due with her third child in April. Although I will most likely be back on my feet by then, I am sure I will be in the throes of physical thearpy and am not sure what my stamina will be like that early in my recovery.

Did I mention how lucky I am to have my friend doulicia as my backup? She wrote a very touching post on her blog about our relationship, and I share her sentiments exactly. We are not only colleagues, but also friends. This was brought home to me by how quickly she picked up the ball and organized a food caravan for me and my family shortly after my accident. (Gosh, I am so lucky!) Her doula heart took over and went into overdrive, and after a few quick emails, we are scheduled to have friends bring us a meal 3 nights a week, for the next 3 weeks. Is that awesome or what? Doulicia, I salute you.

This experience has not only been a huge inconvienence for me, but it has also been a huge lesson as well. It has taught me how very blessed I am. I married a truly great person. Mark has been fantastic over the past 3.5 weeks. He has worked really hard to keep up the house and the kids and also maintain his job. It is not easy doing his job, as well as mine, but he has done it really well, and with little complaint. Thanks honey, I love you so very much.

It has also shown me how many wonderful friends I have. As a doula, I am really used to giving-- Of myself, my energy, my time etc. I am a pretty independent person and I am not used to taking. I give! I am a giver! This has been a lesson in accepting help gracefully. When a situation like this happens, people come out of the woodwork and want to know what they can do to help. I give thanks to all my friends and family who have not only brought us meals, but also shuttled my kids to and from school, picked them up for playdates....and even kept them overnight. When asked what someone can do for me/us I have often said, "I'm not sure, but I will let you know." And then I do figure it out. Thank you so much: Lynn, Natalie, Alicia, Erika, Anne, Joan, Susie, Julia, Lisa, Beth, Jere and everyone else who I am forgetting. I am supremely lucky to be surrounded by such an awesome support system. We honestly couldn't have gotten this far without all of you.

So, as for the rest of 2006, and my doula prospects. I hope to be helping another former client this May. I ran into her not long before my accident, and she asked if I was available in May. Right now, I anticipate that I will be. Attending that birth in May, will mean it will have been 7 months between clients. The longest stretch between clients since I began practicing. I plan to take it slow. My overall health is what is most important to me. If I am not 100% then I will be of little use to others.

this pretty much sums it up

If you want to know what it was like at the scene of the accident, this is a pretty acurate representation. 

ankle haiku

Orthapedic doc
clever breed of carpenter
surgeon of my dreams

things i am learning about myself as i sit on the sofa and recuperate

1. I can eat raisin bran for any meal.

2. I am adjusting too easily to being waited on. Brooke gave me a dress-up crown today because she said I am the queen and everyone else in the family is my "slave".

3. I am getting worse at Sudoku the longer I do it.

4. I have the attention span of a gnat.

5. I have absolutely no disciplinary power over my kids right now.

6. Narcotic drugs make you constipated.

7. Milk of Magnesia tastes like ass.

8. Yesterday I bathed completely by myself, without help from anyone! (I am thrilled by the little victories.)

So as you can see (I hope) I have not yet lost my sense of humor.